Growing Your Cat Family

How To Choose A Cat To Blend Into Your Family 
Once upon a time, a little stray tortoiseshell named Daphne walked up to my back porch and demanded entry. Those of you familiar with previous blogs will know that Daphne is now a dear member of my family. However, her introduction into my world was not Maddie’s, my other cat at the time, favorite thing.

Maddie was your typical loud-mouth Siamese (and a complete drama queen) but this was different a much different sound than I was used to hearing from her. There was primal anger to that howl. I looked out my side door and there sat a kitten staring right into my house. Maddie was howling, about to throw herself through the glass door. Maddie had been the queen of her kingdom for 12 years and was not about to welcome a little stray in it without voicing her opinion. 

Long story short, it was a futile waste of energy over the next few weeks as this little tortoiseshell, now named Daphne Louise, worked her way into my heart. I had remembered that my vet told me years ago that when you introduce 2 cats, do so gradually. A glass door (or similar) is best to get them acquainted. 
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Regardless, there are many other extra considerations to take into account and prepare for when adding a cat or kitten to an already established cat and their home.

The Age Factor
Daphne was maybe 6 months old when she was introduced to Maddie. The younger the cat, the easier it is for older cats to accept and welcome them. Perhaps if Daphne had been a tiny 6 week-old instead, it might’ve been easier but I’ll never know. 

Adding a fully mature or grown cat can be more challenging, but it’s not impossible. Several customers at the cat spa have successfully added older cats to their families. While the cohesion may take a bit longer, eventually the cats do cohabitate and tolerate each other just fine. 

Cats are incredibly territorial, hence Maddie going bonkers at the mere sight of a cat on the doorstep. Even now, Daphne will do the same when she sees a cat in the yard cutting through to the neighbors. Her one-acre kingdom and the next-door lot is hers and she intends to keep it that way! 

This ownership of their space is the same indoors and outdoors. Keep in mind that when some cats get territorial, they can mark and spray. Having the new addition and established cat spayed or neutered can help the temptation to compete and mark all over your house.

Does Gender Matter?
Gender really doesn’t matter when adding a new cat to the brood. Some research has shown that a male can be easier to accept, but that is not 100% confirmed, so don’t let that sway your choice. My 2 girls were just fine together and the hierarchy always happens immediately. 
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The cats will decide who is in charge and who is along for the ride so boy or girl, pick the new cat that is right for you. If it is a stray who shows up, well then they made the decision for you.

Take Into Account Each Cat’s History
One main consideration to remember is how this new cat was raised – feral, in a home, shelter cat, indoor-only, outdoor only or a combination. All of these have their plusses and minuses and can alter the dynamics of your home.
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I had always had indoor cats. When Daphne came along she was an entirely new bag, as she had clearly been someone’s cat previously but also had to go outside. I was very uncomfortable with her being out so I spoke to my vet about it. She said that if a kitten becomes accustomed to being outdoors early in its development, there is sort of a switch that goes on and likely cannot be turned off. The cat will always want to go out. Prohibiting that can lead to stress and anger. Some cats will even shred doors and screens and jump out of windows to get outside. 

This was a new world for me to be the doorman for Daphne. I also was not used to the ‘presents’ she would bring me. Not every cat who is feral/stray will be an indoor/outdoor cat. Some will learn to love the indoors, so there are exceptions. 

A friend of mine has a feral cat who showed up and just keeps her distance but will not go outside at all. Perhaps she is simply smart enough to realize that she doesn’t need to hunt for food and shelter anymore. One caveat is that this lovely cat will never be a lap cat due to her upbringing. Take this into consideration, as it can be a learning experience with the different ways they were raised.

What Should I Consider When Adding A Cat?
Once Daphne decided that my home was going to be her home, there were some things to consider. You wouldn’t think adding one new cat would make a difference but it really does. 

• Do you have the space? Oftentimes you will need separate beds, litterboxes, food dishes and spaces each cat can call their own. This is especially important during the introduction phase.  small home or apartment can seem cramped with additional cats vying for their space.
  
  
• Do you have the time? Introducing a new pet can be a big time demand. You have to make sure both cats still feel important and loved. If you neglect one, they might get jealous. Cats do enjoy alone time with their humans and can be greedy if they feel neglected, so this can take up a bit more time.
  
  
• Can you afford another pet? Make sure you take expenses like more food, litter and vet visits into account. One wouldn’t think another cat would add much more but it can, especially if they require different foods, supplements or medicines. 
  
  
• What upkeep will they require? This goes hand in hand with both time and money. For example, if the cat is long hair and now daily brushing and grooming, you either need to take it to a groomer (money) or do it yourself (time). 
  
  

I never thought much about it but the addition of Daphne did increase my time and budget. More litter, more cat boxes to clean, more food, taking them at different times to the vets, additional vet visits and costs. While these shouldn’t dissuade you, these practical and hidden factors should be considered.

How To Safely Add a Cat To Your Family
Now the new cat is here and you need to get the current cat to accept it. Then they will all live together in peace and harmony, right? Not so fast. There is a process that should take place to avoid unnecessary drama and feline unrest in your home.
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The main point my vet told me was to make the introduction gradual and to let them see each other (this is why glass doors are helpful!) in order for them to get used to each other. Opening the door and pushing them together and hoping for the best is NOT the way to go. This will most certainly cause headaches for everyone involved! 

1. Use a glass door or possibly a baby gate to let them see each other and feel it out. 
   
   
2. Introduce them to each other’s smell. Cats have a superb sense of smell that’s closely tied with their territorial behaviors. Put the new cat’s scent on a shirt and letting the current cat smell it, and vice versa. This can really ease the drama once fully introduced. Even at the cat spa, one cat may smell the presence of another in another room and the fur is up. This is another reason we don’t intermingle the cats as cat fights are not fun to break up. 
   
   
3. Once all that is done and you are ready to open the door and let them bump noses. Be sure to give it time. They could instantly be besties (one can hope!), simply tolerate each other, or avoid each other completely. My 2 never really warmed up in the 3 years they were together. Daphne tried harder and made some wholehearted efforts to bond with Maddie but it never was going to happen. Only on cold winter nights would I see them on each side of a heater or on each side of my legs on the bed but that was the closest Maddie would allow her to get. 
   
   
4. Monitor the situation. It may come in waves, so be sure you trust your cats completely before you leave them alone together.
   
   

You can also use calming spray pheromones that vet offices use to chill the situation. I use them religiously for grooming, and they really do calm and soothe upset cats. Having a spray bottle or wall plug-in ready to go is a great way to buffer the drama that may ensue between the cats. 
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Adding a new kitten or cat to the mix can be fun and exciting, but it is important to take it slow and easy with both cats. Their personalities are unique, just like humans, so sometimes these new friendships just click and other times, they don’t. Following some tips and considerations can ease the stress and make the transition to a larger family all the more fun.